What Did Dela-Ware? Not Me, That’s For Sure
Oh, snap. Within five minutes of meeting Mr. Delaware, he’d used the term crotch rocket in front of me to describe his second motorcycle (his first being the gasoline leaking cruiser he’d rode to meet me at Old Dominion Brewery). I suppose I could have taken that phraseology as an indicator of this man’s character, […]
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Silence Isn’t Golden
I’ve signed your name on the universal list of those whose bravery failed them when it came time to end a quasi-relationship. The list is long, and much like a guest book or headstone, names are printed sans fanfare and on display without a story, history or eulogy recited. Because that’s what is typically done […]
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Saying “Yes!” in Atlantic City
People in Connecticut, New York, and New Jersey drive like they are auditioning to be bats out of hell — all the speed, none of the experience. I swear to gosh that at one point I was barreling down a turnpike at eighty miles per hour and cars were swerving by me on the left […]
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New York in 24 Hours, or Low-Stakes Dating…Or Actually, Both
Man, I could spend waaay too many hours stroking New York City’s ego. I’d wax perpendicularly about the view from the Empire State Building. I’d shout from the rooftops about sailing a boat on a tucked away lake by the Alice in Wonderland Statue. And the library? With the exhibit about lunch (yes, lunch!) — […]
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The Ultimate Online Dating Showdown: Fantasy vs. Reality
If you asked me whether you, yes, you, should online date, I would without hesitation say Heck. Yes. Heck yes. I am definitely pro-online dating (and currently professionally online dating, which is another kind of pro-dating). However, dating online comes with a twist: your first impression of a person is indeed a fantasy. Look, you […]
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The Math of an Awkward Goodbye
I have a really hard time ending dates. Painstakingly hard. I might as well be trying to perform a root canal on a penguin with a pudding cup as my only tool. Typically a date has a formula of sorts: we are going to do X (in which X = an activity that has a […]
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Giants Sleep, Alicia Dates: Connecticut
Somewhere in Connecticut * a giant is taking a snooze. He’s lying face-up with a large schnoz pointing proudly to the sky, a rotund belly perhaps enlarged from too many bear claws bought at a local bakery, and knobby knees that protrude awkwardly from below his rather wimpy thighs. This giant – be he a […]
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Role Reversal: Meg Dates, I Produce
So, in trying to coordinate a double date for Megan and myself , Megs maybe/definitely stumbled upon a boy who made her not only smile, but radiate with hope for her own future as well as the future of humanity. There were definitely fawns, bunnies, and tiny unicorns crawling out of the woodwork when she […]
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Rhode Island Introduces a New Term
My cousin, Elle, is a marvel. While staying at the loft she shares with her manfriend, Joe, they had a small get-together – and hallelujah. For one, Noah had made enough spanakopita to feed a family of raccoons and their extended relatives who were visiting from the next hill over, and we needed some help […]
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Search and Rescue in West Virginia
We stood on a natural seam – where a grassy spell was stitched to the woods, creating a hem line holding together that where visibility was clear and that where brambles, briar and shadows lay. Megan and our unsmiling search-and-rescue team leader to my left, a gaggle of teenage girls to my right. Even the […]
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