People who knew you before right this moment tend to bring a different insight on your YOU-ness than people you will meet after this moment. It’s one of the reasons I love strangers: they are able to show you who you can be. Old friends show you who you were though, and recognize when your were-ness and are-ness are colliding. And old friends, especially ones that sat in a car with you for 67 days and talked dating for what probably amounted to 65 of those days, see that even more acutely.
And so I bring you a recent textversation with Megan:
Me: I am going to be okay even if I am single forever, right?
Megs: Yes, because your value is not dependent on some random guy’s approval of you, but rather a culmination of all your relationships, your relationship with yourself and with your work. Being single or not is such a small piece of who you are. The only one who considers it a failure you’re not in a relationship is you. The rest of us just want you to be happy, whatever or whoever that includes.
Megs still: Actually, we want you to be happy and safe. We probably would not be okay if you took up BASE jumping, no matter how happy that made you.
That girl has no idea how wise she is.
(Megs, don’t be shocked if that conversation – or a variation/conclusion there of – winds up in my book.)